Arthur, aged 25, is a transgender woman living like a "nomad" in Xi'an, China.

“I didn't have a concept of home when I was a child, and I didn't know what home was. I didn't know what a complete family should be like. All I knew was that I hated living with a teacher, and at the time, I tried to talk to my mum's family about it every time I came home, but they didn't understand me and thought I was being overly sensitive. Also, my dad never showed up during that time but would always call to lecture me that I should be more like a boy and help the teacher and her family more.”

“I was taken home by my family in the 4th grade and returned to a "home" that I remember vaguely. I was particularly self-conscious and introverted and didn't want to talk to anyone except my Barbie dolls, with whom I could even speak all day.”

“It wasn't until junior high school that I realised the importance of family. Whenever I tried to kill myself, my mum and dad were always there for me, with their tears of pain.”

“By the time I reached high school, I had left Yan'an for Xi'an and moved back and forth between Xi'an and Yan'an. It was mainly because I wanted to get away from my parents, especially when my dad was home. I was afraid to touch anything feminine, including make-up, and living with him was depressing. So, as long as I live alone, I can go out with my make-up on whenever I want without fear of reprimand from my dad.”

“After I went to university, I lived alone in Xi'an. Living alone made me relaxed. I could decorate my room as I pleased and put on as much makeup as possible. Then I went to live with my boyfriend in Guiyang, but after all, it was a strange city, and although I could look like a real girl there, it still didn't feel like home.”

(Excerpts from interviews)

29/09/2022

Pictures: Arthur

Edited by William Liu